Wahoo

Nice job guys. Way to go into the gym of the worst team in the league and lose your hold on the conference title. Everyone's got them figured out now. Well, baseball season starts soon....

I'm sinking to the bottom of my everything.

So, I wonder sometimes if I did something wrong, or am I just destined to be this way? Is it something I can ever fix, or will I keep repeating the same cycle?

I feel like the walls are closing in; that even at 28, my life is running out on me. Thinking back, I can't say I ever remember a time when I was truly happy. I've had periods of contentment in my life. I've even had times where I felt like I found what I was looking for. Those times never lasted long. I wonder more and more often if I'll ever have what I want; if I'll ever be happy. Sometimes I think that whatever I get, it will never be good enough; that I always want more.

I know, I have kids to take care of, and I should put them before me, and I do; but what about me? I feel like I'm either doing something someone else wants me to do, or I'm doing nothing at all. Does it make me a terrible person to want to think about myself once in awhile? Maybe that's it. Maybe I shouldn't post this.....

And the Grammy goes to....

Well, I'm still up, so I guess I should give some thoughts about the Grammy's. After all, I actually watched them. This way, the 4 people that read my blog and chime in with their thoughts, although probably only Eric and Mike will. Anyway:

The Grammy's don't have a host? It's been awhile since I watched.

I'm not a big fan of country music, but you gotta love Natalie Maines. She's never backed down from her views. Much respect. (And she looked hot tonight; isn't she the chubby blonde one?) How many of you agree with her now, 3 1/2 years later?

Hard rock still can't make it on t.v., huh?

Who's idea was it to group Smokey Robinson, Lionel Ritchie, and Chris Brown together??? I know Chris Brown is popular right, but he does not belong on stage with Smokey and Lionel Ritchie. He isn't half the talent; he couldn't even sing his own song (although the boy does have moves, albeit copied from those before him, but I can't do it). I started to wonder if there was any real singing talent left, then Christina Aguilera came out, which leads me to.....

With all due respect to Mary J., who deserves all of the personal and professional triumphs she's achieved over the past year or so, Christina Aguilera is The Best Female Vocalist on the Planet. Period. You don't even have to like her music to understand that.

I love the Red Hot Chili Peppers.

What's this about a competition of unknown singers for a spot on the Grammy's singing a duet with Justin Timberlake? They were like "you get to vote on who performs later." Based on what? Who was voting on this? Well, at least the girl didn't embarass herself, although the performance wasn't memorable.

"Well, to quote the great 'Simpsons' — 'Heh-Heh.'------that's hot

I'm finding it more and more difficult to hate John Mayer.

Who's the little punk who turned on the music while Tony Bennett and Stevie Wonder were talking?!?

The James Brown tribute was nice; draping his robe over the microphone as the lights went out was especially poignant.

I really liked Carrie Underwood's rendition of Desperado

Who the hell is Beyonce that Prince is introducing her? No one else sees a problem with that? She's a star, sure; but she's not Prince.

What hasn't Rick Rubin done? Timbaland who?

I'm tired; that's all I have for now.

"I am such an idiot! I can't believe I said that!"

Soooooo, a couple of days ago, I said something I shouldn't have (don't confuse that with saying something I didn't mean, because I meant it) to someone I should not have said it to, at a time and place that was totally inappropriate for saying such things. It just kind of came out (no, I won't tell you what it was). My instincts in these type of situations are typically dead-on, but I'm afraid I may have been way off the mark this time. Maybe I can just pretend it never happened. I am an ass.

Ten bucks if you know where I got the title. Okay, not ten bucks; but I'll think you're cool.

I quit

It amazes me how some people can come to be in a position of power without having any skills as a leader. I promise that this will be my one and only rant about my job, but I just thought I'd get it out before I quit and bitch about just a few of the things that bother me about my "boss". Strap yourself in and get a drink; this is going to take awhile and it probably will have no rhyme or reason to it.

Just today, while I was in the kitchen and my "G.M." was "managing" the dining room, we had a man come in the restaurant who smelled as though he hadn't showered in months. No one could sit within 25 feet of this man. Now, I'm not speaking ill of this man, nor do I wish to speculate as to why he may have smelled so awfully, but that fact is, he made all of the employees and the other guests very, very uncomfortable. Also, we had two ministers come in to have lunch. They asked several personal questions of their server, then told her she was beyond saving and was going to go to hell. Then they proceeded to approach a couple who was dining near them, asked them several personal questions, then them they were going to hell. How did our G.M. handle these situations? He ran away. Hid in the office. He allowed everyone else in the restaurant to feel uncomfortable so that he could avoid a confrontation, thereby maintaining his own comfort. These might seem like minor events, but it's the principle of the matter. It's his job a manager, a leader, to make his establishment a comfortable place for the employees and guests of the restaurant.

No, I'm not done. When he does decide it's time to confront an employee, he does it with hostility. It's so bad, that I feel I have to compromise some of my own standards because the employees catch so much shit from the other managers (the kitchen manager is his little protege). I have to be especially lenient because they're treated so poorly. This is one of the biggest reasons I'm seeking employment elsewhere. Anyway, our district manager, came in the other night. I was the only manager there at the time, so we sat and talked for awhile. A nice chat, I thought. Afterward, one of the servers took her aside to inquire as to why she hadn't had a raise in two years. Now, I had explained to her that servers don't get raises. You make your money from your guests. I teach my servers everything I know about great guest service, and those who choose to listen invariably make more money. I explained to this server that would be happy to help her figure out what she could do better with her guests. She accepted this, but wanted to hear it from the DM. She asked the DM why she hadn't had a raise in two years, or an opportunity to be a trainer. The DM told her two years wasn't a long time, she had servers that worked for for ten years, and "Look at you. You look like a sack of shit." The fact that a DM would talk to a server like that astounds me.

So, a few days later, GM comes to work and tells this particular server that her apron looks like hell and she has to either buy a new one or go home. Now, those of us who care about doing our jobs right have a process for going about change. First we explain the change that needs to be made, in this case a better looking uniform (I should say that her apron was not dirty or wrinkled, just a little faded). Then, we explain why this change is important for everyone, as well as how everyone will go about such a change. Lastly, we set a deadline for said change to be made, and explain the consequences of not achieving the set goal. We do not say "Buy a new apron right now or go home." We especially don't say these things in front of other employees. Never do we chastise or punish an employee in front of other employees. I thought that was common sense, but I guess not. Anyway, this server leaves, ultimately losing her job, because the DM didn't like her and said get rid of her.

Shortly after sending this server home, GM gathers everyone together for a pre-shift meeting (which never happens unless there's something to bitch about, despite the fact that daily pre-shift meetings are one of the most important tools for teaching and development). I'm thinking he might begin the process for change I outlined above. Silly me. He says "You all look like trash. I'm fucking sick of this. I'm not going to put with this shit anymore. If I or one of the other managers tells you to fix your uniform, you fix it right then or you'll be sent home. If it's not fixed on your next shift, you'll be discharged." Way to pump everyone up for a great shift. Now, when was the last time you think he mentioned any sort of uniform problem before? It's also noteworthy that the uniforms are about to change drastically, and everyone will have to pay for their own, so who's going to buy anything new now?

What's really great is when you confront him about his behavior and the way he treats people. "I didn't say that." "I didn't say it like that." "Are you going to believe a server over me?" Absolutely. I hope that everyone knows that I have their best interests in mind and I'm constantly going to bat for them (so is Drema, by the way)

GM and KM have created an environment of hostility with a lack of respect, inappropriate, foul language, and sexual harassment. I've spent the last couple of weeks trying to convince everyone that there are other jobs, and they can do better. I'll even give you a reference if you'll just leave. They are the only thing keeping that place together, because God knows I'm just trying to get out at this point.

At a recent employee meeting, when the employees (mostly servers, who are treated the worst, by far) raised some questions about the way the restaurant is run, they were told that they were not asked to work at Texas Steakhouse, they chose to apply and they were all replaceable. Basically he said "Do as I say, not as I do, because I don't need you and I'll get rid of you." I hope the day comes when he realizes just how much he needs his employees.

Basically what goes on here on a daily basis is a GM and KM using whoever they must to get whatever they need at that moment, including me. They give no consideration to achieving future success, developing employees, and providing great guest service. As long as they're not made to look bad, everything is peachy. The worst part about it is that most of the employees don't understand how bad it is and how much better it could be. I do. I was lucky to learn from and work with two of the best people I've come in contact with in this business: Scott Sipler and Julie Gagne. Both work for The Olive Garden, and I have much respect for them both, and that respect grows everyday I'm here. There are others that would tell you the same. I want my people to get a taste of how things are supposed to be. I tried when I first arrived at this restaurant, to no avail. You can't save a sinking ship if you're the only one with a bucket. Time to throw the raft and bail out. I truly care about the people I work with, almost to a fault, but I feel like it's because I understand how to manage a successful operation, and most of the people I work with know that and will go to war for me.

"People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care."

"The way people feel about me is the way they feel about themselves when they are around me."

"Do unto others as they would have you do unto them."

I don't think these are hard concepts to live by. I have others, but these are the main things that GM and KM are not understanding, and they're so set in their ways that they won't change. How hard is it to understand that it's not their job to command people, it's their job to serve people, including employees. Our job is to provide our employees the tools, training, and support they need to give our guests exceptional product and service. They certainly won't take any advice from me. I know this doesn't even begin to paint an accurate picture for outsiders, especially those not familiar with the restaurant business. I just hope everyone who lives this with me knows that I'd love a chance to start new with them so we can do it right together.

I apologize to anyone who sat through that entire thing. That was more for me, though I didn't come close to expressing all of my frustrations. I know that I am very good at what I do, and I'm angry at myself for putting myself in a situation where I cannot do what I do best. I can't wait to quit this job, though I truly feel bad for the good people I'll leave behind, and I can only hope that the ones I can't bring with me will find something better soon.

Hoos you're daddy?

A few things I learned (or I already knew, but were confirmed) from watching Virginia's overtime win over Duke at the JPJ tonight:

~Sean Singletary and J.R. Reynolds are All-Americans and two of the toughest guys in the NCAA; this is the best backcourt in the nation

~Barring an injury to either of those guys, the Cavs just got themselves into the NCAA tournament

~Dave Leitao is ACC, and probably National, Coach of the Year, by a hair over Seth Greenberg (since UVA will sweep Virginia Tech)

~College basketball is the most exciting sport to watch on t.v.

~Virginia might just be for real; whatever it was that was missing for the last 10 years or so, this team has

~John Paul Jones Arena is one fantastic venue for hoops, and a great home court

I haven't been this excited about UVA basketball since Curtis Staples was raining down threes and Harold Deane was running the point.